The Best Marketing Message for Coaches (Hint: It’s Not Pain or Desire)

Coach, if you’ve ever wondered, “Should my marketing message be focused on my audience’s pain points or their desires?”, you’re in the right place, friend.

Today, I’m letting you in on one of my favorite marketing tips which is how to choose between pain points, desires, or the hidden third option that no one talks about that’s completely changed the game... Not just for attracting aligned clients, but for making my marketing feel lighter, more natural, and way more me.

Why Your Marketing Message Isn’t Landing (Yet)

If you’re showing up consistently, posting your heart out, and still not getting great client inquiries, you’re not alone. You’ve probably been told to focus on either your audience’s pain points or their desires in your marketing message.

And on paper, that advice sounds solid.

But if you’ve been attracting coaching clients who feel unready, disempowered, or constantly stuck in their stuff, it's likely your messaging, not your method.

What I learned (the hard way) was that if your message doesn’t match your clients’ actual readiness and/or speak to their empowerment, your content won’t convert the types of coaching clients you'd consider to be "ideal".

In this post, we’re diving into the three core types of marketing messages, and how to shift into the one that finally creates momentum, clarity, and clients who are ready to show up fully in your coaching relationships.

Let’s dive into the three messaging styles you need to understand to attract coaching clients who are not only ready, but also empowered to take action with you.

Marketing Message Option #1: Pain Point Marketing (The Old Standby That Can Backfire)

Pain point messaging is where you speak directly to your audience’s challenges.  These are the mental, emotional, or circumstantial struggles they’re facing in that moment.

And yes, it works. I’ve used it. It’s brought in clients and students.

But here’s what I noticed (and you might’ve noticed this too)...

When I leaned too hard into pain-focused messaging, I started attracting people who were deep in the pain. Like really stuck in it.

And while they wanted support, it was hard for them to move forward because they couldn’t see the forest through the trees.

Here’s what that often looks like in practice... Let's say you’re a financial coach helping women invest for the first time. You might’ve been taught to say things like,

"Are you constantly worrying about your future and feeling behind in life because you didn’t learn about money sooner? Are you scared you’ll never have enough to retire — let alone feel financially free?"

This type of pain point messaging pulls on fear, lack, and shame, and it’s what so many coaches were taught to do...  agitate the wound so your audience takes action.

Now, I’m not saying we avoid pain entirely. It’s part of our growth, and acknowledging where your audience is builds trust and rapport.

But if we linger there too long, we tend to attract people who aren’t ready for the level of coaching we provide.

So, ask yourself… have you ever worked with someone who was stuck in their story? Who wanted change, but couldn’t take that first step?

That’s often the result of overly pain-focused messaging. Let’s keep going.

Marketing Message Option #2: Desire Marketing (The Feel-Good Magnet With a Catch)

Desire-based marketing is all about painting the picture of what’s possible.

And I’ll be honest, when I shifted into this, I started attracting the most incredible people. These were the visionaries, thought leaders, and big-picture thinkers who were hungry for something more.

They were motivated, positive, ready to invest. Jackpot, right?

Well, sort of.

Here's what I noticed with these amazing humans. They could see their dream life so clearly, but when it came time to do the daily work to bring it to life, and actually BECOME the version of themselves who's living that vision… many of them froze.

They were lit up by the vision, but stuck on the action.

And that’s when I knew, I was getting close to my signature client… but I had to go one layer deeper.

Before we talk about this third and most powerful messaging style, I want to share a free resource with you. Marketing is only one of six steps to becoming what I call a "Signature" Coach. This is a coach who's known as THAT coach in their niche for their powerful presence and truly one of a kind offers. And they're the one everyone wants to work with!

If you want to create a content marketing system that feels natural and signature to your energy, and also learn the other five steps to create a coaching experience everyone wants... go ahead and grab the FREE masterclass now.

Marketing Message Option #3: Empowerment Marketing (The Sweet Spot That Changes Everything)

Empowerment marketing bridges the gap between pain and desire.

It acknowledges where your audience is, celebrates where they want to go, and (most importantly) helps them feel capable of getting there.

Here’s what that looks like:

1. You spotlight their strengths and resources. Instead of just naming their pain or selling the dream, you help them see what’s already within them... even if they can’t see it yet! This sparks confidence and belief in their ability to move forward.

2. You guide them through simple, doable shifts. This isn’t about promising overnight transformation. It’s about small, potent perspective shifts that get them into consistent motion. It’s helping them to see whatever topic they’re struggling with through a more empowered lens. This creates a more open and expanded awareness that creates space for curiosity and new possibilities to come in.

3. You create quick wins. Give them micro-assignments, which are small action steps they can implement right away... even in your free content. The more they win, the more they believe, and the more they become the version of themselves who gets results.

And that’s what makes empowerment marketing so powerful. These are the clients who don’t just dream, they do.

They take your content, your coaching, your tools, and they run with it. They’re not just visualizing the result. They’re actively becoming the result.

Real-Life Messaging Examples for Coaches

Marketing Message Example 1: Life Coaches Helping with Confidence

Pain Point Message: "Are you constantly second-guessing yourself and holding back from going after what you truly want? Feeling stuck and overwhelmed because self-doubt is running the show?"

Desire Message: "Imagine waking up every day feeling fully confident, speaking your truth with ease, and boldly going after your dreams with zero resistance."

Empowerment Message: "You’ve already overcome challenges in your life. You know how strong and capable you are. Let’s build on that and take the next small step toward the confidence you deserve… together."

Example 2: Business Coaches Helping Coaches Get Clients

Pain Point Message: "Are you tired of posting on social media, feeling like you’re chasing clients down, and getting zero response? Or frustrated and wondering if you’ll ever land another coaching client again?"

Desire Message: "What if you had a waitlist of dream clients excited and ready to work with you every single month?"

Empowerment Message: "You have valuable expertise that people need right now. Let’s craft one powerful piece of content this week that speaks directly to your signature clients and gets them reaching out to you."

 So friend, as you can see:

• Pain point messaging calls out the struggle.

• Desire messaging lights up the vision.

• But empowerment messaging bridges the gap.

It reminds your audience that they’re already powerful, and they have what it takes.

 And remember, marketing is just one of the six steps inside my Signature Coach System™ that I give you in the free masterclass: The Signature Coach: 6 Steps to Becoming THAT Coach & Creating a One-of-a-Kind Coaching Program Everyone Wants. 

Inside, I walk you through all six steps to attract, nurture, and convert your signature clients with more ease.

Until next time, Coach, keep building that empire.

XO, KellyAnne